Sunday, April 27, 2008

Dr. Kelso Leaving Scrubs !!!!!!!!! (UPDATED)

January 2009 Update: Scrubs has moved from NBC to ABC and it's 8th season is currently running. Dr. Kelso is not back as the Chief of Medicine but he does show up during the episodes just hanging around the Hospital Coffee Shop.

I just watched last Thursday's Scrubs episode and I can't believe Dr. Kelso is leaving. He was one of my favorites, I mean the guy actually talks to his muffins, and he knows how to annoy the hell out of Dr. Cox. The episode didn't even do him justice, it wasn't one of those goodbye episodes, it felt like the creators wrote it in one hour or something. It's just really sad :(

Here are some of my favorite Dr. Kelso quotes:

Dr. Kelso: "What has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap? [gives a double thumbs-up at himself]. Bob Kelso!"

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Dr. Kelso: What has two thumbs, a funny voice, and still doesn't give a crap? Bob Kelso! I added the funny voice to keep it fresh.

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J.D.: Dr. Kelso. The doc here has been telling me that you have some great stories. I wouldn't mind hearing one sometime.
Dr. Kelso: Oh what the hell. Back in '68 I don't like you. The end.

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Dr. Kelso: I became a doctor to save lives, heal wounds, and occasionally to drop the MD bomb to pull hot tail in bars. You know what else works? Cosmonaut. Thank me later.

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Kelso : What Do You Want??!!
JD : Nothing i dont want anything from you ever
Kelso: thats what my son always says, thats until mother's day comes around and he wants to go halfies on the pasta pot for Enid, shes not my mother dammit!

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Turk: You know, I wish I could be an insensitive cynical robo-doc like you, but unfortunately I don't hate the world enough, you know what I'm saying chief?
Cox: People please stop calling me chief
Dr. Kelso: Hey numbnuts!

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[Elliot is about to kiss her boyfriend, Paul, who is a male nurse.
[Dr. Kelso walks past]
Elliot: [Nervous] Nurse i need clean sheets straight away to room..one..one thousand
[Kelso Stops]
Paul: oh she's covering because she's emberarrased that she likes a nurse and i can't figure out why.
Dr.Kelso: Well thats because your doing a woman's job son..have a good one!

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Dr. Kelso: Well, if it isn't Dr Turk, friendly face of Sacred Heart.
Turk: Yeah, Dr Kelso, umm, about these posters... They're kinda making me uncomfortable.
Dr. Kelso: Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize you felt that way. Well here's what we're gonna do... I'm gonna leave them up.
Turk: I can live with that... Or I can sue you.
Dr. Kelso: Dr Turk, you are an employee here. I can use your image, your name, I can manufacture tiny Dr Turk action figures that cost $12.95 and when you pull the string it'll say "I don't like these posters of me." Isn't that right, Ted?

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Dr. Kelso: Here at Sacred Heart, I like to think that our patients choose our hospital not only because I leak vicious rumors about competing hospitals to the press, but also because when they see one of our doctors they think, Now that's a professional!
Elliot: Um, Sir I don't think I look unprofessional.
Dr. Kelso: I've let this whole new look thing slide the last few months, but now that your colleagues are beginning to complain I'm going to give you the same advice I give my son every morning. Lose the makeup! Get a haircut! And stop using my razor to shave your fun zone!

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[Turk is occupying Dr. Kelso's lunch spot]
Dr. Kelso: Interesting tidbit: Back during the gold rush, when a man staked a claim, if he came upon another man panning his spot... why, he could shoot that fella dead without even asking any questions.
Chris Turk: You don't say.
Dr. Kelso: [sighs] Simpler times.

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Dr. Kelso: [Dr. Kelso just found out Turk cut off the plug of the Pacman machine] I know it was you.
Chris Turk: [waving the plug around] You mean this right here? It's mine from home.
Dr. Kelso: Forty Million, Son. You have any idea how many patients I had to ignore to get that high-score? People died.

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Dr. Kelso: Son, do you think I got to be Chief of Medicine by being late?
Dr. Cox: Noooo, Bobbo, you got there by backstabbing and ass-kissing.
Dr. Kelso: Maybe so, but I started those things properly at eight!

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